ive been looking for attention from other people. developing a “crush” on different people . trying to find someone who can make me feel complete, someone who understands me , doesnt judge me , and knows me better then i know myself. but ive noticed i push everyone away,i dont want myself to open up to anyone else.. the worst part of it all is that im still holding on to someone who has let go a LONG time ago. not a day goes by when i dont think of how things COULD be right now.what hurts the most is that i put myself thru soo much for one person,had and still have nights where i cry myself to sleep.my heart is still taken. i am still in love with my ex. and to be completely honest i hate it.